Couples Counseling

Call Lorraine Webster C.A.C. at (610) 269-8396

Pathway Counseling Services, 811 West Chester Pike, West Chester, PA

Services: Monday thru Friday 11:00 a.m. to 7:00 p.m.    Cost:   $55.00  

Couples Counseling can make the difference.  Many people grow up without good role models.  They never saw a healthy relationship and do not know how they work.  Understanding some of the differences, between men and women, allows each partner to be true to themselves and still be supportive to their partner.  Knowing how to avoid the pitfalls of circular fighting helps them get rid of negative habits.  Even difficult issues like infidelity, addiction or abuse can be healed if both parties are willing to work through the process and lot go of the past.

Mother Nature is very efficient.  She tends to bring men and women together who can help each other grow.  Some common combinations are:

1) The pursuer and the distancer

One partner has a need for approval and the other is withholding.

This makes it necessary for the person who needs approval to learn to give approval to themselves and create a network of support outside of the relationship.  It also makes it necessary for the distancer to make an effort to be more giving which will help them grow.

2) The Introvert and The Extrovert

If one partner is Introverted they will require down time to rejuvenate.  The Extroverted partner will need interaction.  This will cause both to stretch and grow.  The introvert will need to set limits with the extrovert in order to get enough alone time to feel centered.  The extrovert will have to develop an understanding of their partners limits and accept that different personality types process things in opposite ways.  The Extrovert will need to maintain a support network of friends that are willing to be available to them when their introverted partner is unavailable.

3) Type A personality and Type B personality

If one partner is a type A personality and the other partner is a type B personality, this causes the type A personality to accept that just being is a good thing and can be a source of relaxation and creatively.  The type A can learn to appreciate stillness instead of mistaking inactivity for laziness.  The type B personality can learn to appreciate the intense energy of the A personality and allow them to inspire them to be more active. In the end they will both be more balanced.

4) The Yes Man and The Screamer

Some males who grow up with trauma or addiction have problems with anger later in life. This could come out in passive aggression, which creates a yes man, who does not say what he means or mean what he says.  The partner of a yes man usually turns into a screamer, due to being frustrated with broken promises, they ends up verbally abusing the yes man. In order to heal the problem the yes man needs to start saying no to the things he really does not want to do and lean to set limits with his partner.  The partner who is doing the yelling needs to stop the abusive behavior and ask questions about what the yes man really wants and needs. 

5) The Planner and The Random Thinker

If one partner is a planner and the other partner is a random thinker, this causes the planner to be the detail partner who usually pays the bills and arranges the social activities.  The random thinker initiates projects and relies on the planner to keep them on task.  This makes for a nice division of labor. Everything depends on whether the partners embrace the differences or attempt to change the other to match themselves.

6)  The Overachiever and the Critic

The overachiever gets a boost of self-esteem through accomplishment. When they couple with a critical personality.  They are constantly trying to gain approval from a partner who always sees the one thing they did not do well.  This dynamic forces the overachiever to try harder in hopes of being rewarded with recognition, which causes the critic to judge them more harshly for not knowing how to relax and have balance in their lives.  In time, resentment will set in and the relationship will suffer. The critic needs to reverse their perception and learn to praise the overachiever so they can relax and be content to do less.

7) The Owl and the Pussycat

If one partner is the Owl and the other partner is the Pussycat, this will cause the pussycat to grow past their need to be dependent and cared for by others.  The Owl will have to stretch enough to let go of always being right and get off the pedestal.

8) The Abuser and The Victim

If one partner is the abuser and the other partner is the victim, this causes the abuser to learn anger management skills and avoid taking their stress out on their partner.  The victim needs to stop making excuses for the abuser and learn to stand up for themselves and set limits.

Confidentiality: Everything discussed in therapy is protected by Confidentially laws.

Couples Counseling can help with these issues and many others.

To make an appointment call Lorraine Webster, C.A.C. at (610) 269-8396

Pathway Counseling Services, 811 West Chester Pike, West Chester, PA